The last 15 days and 100 breaths. . .


Over the last 15 days, I have been pushing my own boundaries: emotionally, physically and spiritually.
I have been detoxing physically to make my body lighter. I have started jogging to be fitter and
I started with my weight program again so I can be stronger.

I have also undertook to venture into the deep dark places of subconscious as to forgive the old wounds that

This has not been an easy task. I have had to dis-create old agreements that I made for myself.

I have also undertaken to break last years treatment record in my practise! of 411 treatments for 2013,

I am now on 421 treatments for 2014. (still time to better it)

Spiritually I have gone deep within my heart and become stronger in my believe system.

I have been tested by the universe and put in all kinds of awkward situations so I can affirm me
And say no.

I have also ventured out of my comfort zone. I have had dinner at my neighbours, I have socialized in a bar,

played pool, gone to Durban in the traffic and had excessive noise in order to grow me as a person.

I have realized that I live a truly blessed life and that I am thankful for this experience.

I have understood why and what human beings have to endure for money and found a deeper compassion all round.

I was happy to return to my shire of silence, of listening to the birds, communing with the wind and
Knowing that the Universal spirit is here in truth and in my happiness of serving.

I have also learnt that I too need a massage to release my knots, my tears and to keep
Opening my heart to learn from any and all experiences.

I have learnt to communicate better,
To speak from the heart.
A gentle heart combined with my inner voice will always guide me.
For now the warrior is tamed within, the journey continues.
The sword that I once used has been transformed into a flower of love.
All my love.


Emotional Cleanser

IMG_20141005_155730 IMG_20141010_183554 IMG_20141009_064134

Yes, I did it again. I decided to do a 5 day detox, because I can.

Here is my method of detoxing!

Breakfast : Raw juices of Beetroot, carrot, apple.

Smoothie: Berry juice with banana and papaya.

Snacks: Nuts, Fruits only.

Lunch: 1 bowl of rice with veg.

Dinner: Soup : vegetable soup

The Results : . . .

My skin is glowing.

I feel lighter.

I also undertook to do an emotional cleanse of all emotions of anger,

disappointment, bitterness, old wounds. I wrote them down,

burnt the page and just forgave and released it! I felt so good.

I am making a disciplined effort to keep myself balanced

by keeping healthy.

I realize we all comfort eat/ emotionally eat when we are angry,

sad, depressed but we can overcome it by honestly

voicing our emotions and feelings.

By voicing, I am feeling like this. I used food to numb what I felt

and I am so glad, I am feeling FREE! again to be me.

So I undertake to keep my spirit and body LIGHTER.

To be Joyful, Happy, forgiving with a Lighter Heart and body.

I committed myself to jogging again and to do weight training everyday.

I am feeling stronger emotionally and mentally sharp.

I am enjoying the cleansing process.

To start off!~ Do one day of detox a week and see what happens.

Meet My YOU TUBE Guru

When I decided to make a You Tube video, I had no clue?
WP my partner, said I needed a script.
I had no clue as to where I would find someone to record the massages.
My friend Shine, mentioned they were also doing a you tube video and
a young lady called Tarryn would be visiting in a few weeks to do it.
I then contacted Tarryn and arranged a meeting. A young, vibrant, enthusiastic,
Creative young lady.

I named her my you tube guru.

She holds such creativity and was super helpful in creating the recording,
coming with innovative ideas, efficient communication, uploading and
  a really professional approach to doing this for me.

I recommend her to anyone :

Tarryn Grobler

Whats the importance of a You Tube video?  EXPOSURE to Social media
For some seeing is believing!

Hang onto your JOY!

body moves

I have found that my JOY is my heart.

My joy is doing what I love.  I wake up at night with my arms above my head,

I dream of massaging and repairing bodies. This morning I woke up with my

hematite bangle engrossed in my hair, my arms stretched out and

I was like, hmmmm : You’ve been massaging in your sleep again.

My Joy is coming home to my love.

My joy is eating healthy food with a bit of chocolate in the mix or pizza.

My joy is being happy.

My joy is laughing.

My joy is enjoying the silence.

My joy is speaking my truth.

My joy is being Colleen.

My joy is playing, writing. . .

My joy is also meeting new people.

My joy is having impulsive drumming sessions before 8am.

My joy is dancing.

My joy is just being.

My joy gives me so much happiness, a flowing of gratitude.

BUT !!!!

Sometimes WORRY, Stress, Overworkedness, EGO comes to Steal it.

DON’T ! let it.

JOY is what fuels me and my heart. So I decided to be joyous, grateful and happy.

May you find your JOY! Be happy. Live. Be. You!

All my love


Relationships : Words create : Words destroy


Having a relationship of any kind is COMPLEX!     When I was growing up as a romantic teenager,

I dreamt and drooled about love, how it should be, how its going to be.

MY preconceived ideas  and expectations has only brought me misery!

I Can Honestly say :    Wake UP Colleen : Real Life is Real and this is what I have learnt so far.

I have been with my partner for 16 years. My grandmother used to say that whoever marries me

should have “hair” on their teeth, I am alot of work, I know. I have changed from the naiive 22 year

old into a 38 year old Warrior, Woman, Demander, Boss, Partner, Supporter, Wife. I have had over 45 life

changing experiences and his still here. He hasn’t run away.

We have fought, laughed, cursed, endured in sickness, madness and health

and our love has grown into a MATURE LOVE. I cannot picture my life without my partner.

What I am going to share is what kills the Passion:

- Disappointment : expecting your partner to be : What he is not!    Stop it.

- Tone of voice : Speaking to your partner in a derogatory way. Stop it.

- Disrespect him/ her. Stop it.

- Old wounds from the past that stay in your mind, and keeps festering. Stop it.

-Comparing partners : Friends do that. Stop it.

-Lack of Honesty. Speak your truth.

-No Sex : No Passion.  If you want it, seduce him or be happily seduced. Regret over sex

or lack thereof is stupid.

-Expectations : you cannot expect someone to be who you want. It just doesn’t work.

We are raised with this expectation of finding our KNIGHT in shinning armour!

YOU Are Your KNIGHT! Stand UP!

Some books to help you heal:

Don Miguel Ruiz : The four agreements and the Mastery of Love.

Make a conscious effort to start working on yourself :

- Sort out your emotional wounds : Forgive, bless, release it.

-Fast and Prayer.

-Disappointment : Let it go. You need to love yourself more.

-Expectations, so you didn’t get what you wanted? boo hoo!  You got what you needed. Buck up and stop being

a victim, see his goodness also.

LOVE is always there, it is the use of JUDGEMENT, BLAMING, ASSUMING, Taking it PERSONALLY is what

kills the LOVE.

Love is LOVE and its very UNCONDITIONAL.

To many couples give up so easily. >>>> Divorce >>>> Separation >>>>Find a new partner to start over.

I say if you have found your soul mate : How come you can quickly UNSOUL MATE this person?

I say how come can you easily start finding FAULT with this person because my dear,

you have old wounds, old stuff that you have carried with you for years and

not dealt with it.

Its time to stop wasting time!

Decide you want to heal and find happiness within yourself which is not dependent

on someone else.

If you keen to enter this journey, book a session with me:  Colleen van Heerden / 0846030604

If not, You want to complain, be a victim, suffer and be a self abuser   >>>>> Enjoy.

I would much rather be happy, healthy, loved and treasured.

From Colleen.

Healer, therapist, blogger, inspirer.

Welcome : A m a z i n g Woman. . .

Body Image work in Progress


My body is work in Progress!

We have talked this subject to death! Lets Move on….

I want to meet amazing people  = Always

People who have quit their jobs and started to LIVE their Passion. ( I have met 4 so far)

I want to meet  SUCCULENT passionate woman who are living their DREAM.

I want to meet free woman, who LOVE their bodies and are not conditioned.

I want to meet a REBELLION of woman who LOVE themselves and LOVE being.

I want to meet amazing people who are MAKING a DIFFERENCE in their lives and OTHERS.

I want to hear about your travels, your inner adventures.

I want to hear about how you overcame and lived to tell the Tale.

I want to hear about how amazing you are !

I want to see your eyes twinkle, your smile widen and your whole body jump into action.

I want to hear about how you Achieved your GOAL!

I want to hear about how you found LOVE, your Love.

I want to hear about how you became DEBT free.

I want to hear about how you LINKED MONEY to SELF LOVE and

started creating it! (I am)

I want to hear about, YOU finding your JOY!

I want to hear about all your amazing amazing LIFE.

You are Amazing!

Your Spirit is free!

You are living You!

All my Love!

Colleen x x x

Body Confidence?

Body Image Thin

Learning to be comfortable in your body, takes practise.

We all were raised to find fault with ourselves, our bodies, our partners

but this leads to an endless life of misery! = No thank you.

Finding a better way is to LOVE.

Love your imperfection.

Make it part of who you are.

Wear the bikini even if you have love handles.

It means you have lived.

Swim as if there is no tomorrow.

Walk up that flight of steps, cough, laugh but enjoy it.

I have abseilled, kayaked, travelled, cycled, built housing in India,

walked on the beach in India with this body.

I have gotten naked to be massaged by beautiful guys.

It didn’t matter that I was fat, or that I have stretch marks,

what mattered was that I loved myself and

that I was prepared to surrender and receive Love.

Surrender and Receive the LOVE.

Connect with others.

Hug more.

The more you love you, the

more you will grow to be your best


All my love


PS! It is totally permitted to have pleasure, ie. ORGASMS with your Imperfect body.

Comparing Your Body?

As we Think of our bodies

Over the past few years, I learnt body acceptance from my partner and by receiving massages

and working on my Inner child.

When you realize that I was really fat and received disdainful gazes, comments and jokes

you begin to realize that

loving yourself is an Inside Job!

Don’t cut off the parts that hurt.

Don’t cut off the imperfect parts.

Love yourself.

Accept yourself.

Be yourself.

The Deeper the pain, the more LOVE is needed.

All my Love.


My body, my rules

Body image 5




Well as you can see I am on a Mission! My mission is to be real! Authentic!

This is what my body looks like! I am tired of the promotion of perfection.

We have imperfect bodies : they have scars, stretch marks, they have given

birth to babies and here we are! still standing.

Body Image in society is all important, you have to wear the high heels that hurt and

disfigure your feet. You have to fast and starve to fit into the black dress!

I never did fit into the black dress.  I did wear heels in my teens but

they hurt my feet, so I opted to fall inlove with takkies.

I love my feet so I wear takkies and comfortable shoes.

I love jeans so I have many of them, as they make my legs look amazing.

I love good fitting undies so I make sure I have plenty of them. (yes, boob sweat is super real)

I love eating, it is the one thing that I enjoy. Tastes, flavour, adventure of how it was

created, I can feel the LOVE! (especially my hubbies cooking)

I love long walks with myself.

I love living. I love my neighbour, she makes the most amazing food and desserts for me. (how can I refuse?)

 I love  helping my partner in the garden, I love eating raw peas out of the pod! yummee ness.

I know I am imperfect but for me : I am perfect.

I love that I don’t conform.

I love that I am rebellious.

I love that You cannot put me into a box!

I love that I have a old spirit and it has guided me all of my life.

So, Affirm what you love ?

Affirm, Your magic?

Affirm, who you are?

Affirm, what you stand for?

Affirm, your goodstuff?

You are beautiful just as you are!

All my love.


Looks are meant to be deceiving….

Body image 2


I have been debating with myself about writing this blog  a l o t.  I have been thinking about how

my sense of my own body image came about. It started when I was about 5 years old.

I didn’t play outside, I played in the kitchen with my grandmother. I was her taste tester

for vetkoek, new cooking ideas, pumpkin fritters.  If she created something new, I was

sitting right at the kitchen table to test it, taste it. I was allowed to do the dishes

which there were mountains of, but I enjoyed the experience of being with her

and experiencing every taste possible.

So I grew to be a little telly tubby. I was short with green eyes and  curly unruly hair and a tongue that

cut through all the bullshit. You can see, I was the ugly duckling.

My mother did battle with my hair everyday, she wanted it flat and well

curls just don’t want to be tamed.

She dressed my sister and I in the same outfit, my sister looked thin.

I naturally looked plump.

People easily judged me because I was plump, fat, obese, out of shape and the list goes on.

So, I adapted to people judging me on the scene! guess what?

They still do.

I don’t  mind anymore because I LOVE ME!

I wake up every morning to do yoga, pray, meditate and go walking.

I feel strong. I feel I can do anything I choose to do.

I feel that my tummy isn’t just the ONE part of me.

I am who I am.  I am happy.

The people who instantly judge, don’t matter.

You matter. 

SO, I keep listening to my Inner Voice and I keep loving me.

All my love.


Your Fate Lies Within you!



Yes! I watched the movie “Brave” and I loved it.  Your Fate lies within you.

I see many people who are dreadfully unhappy in a dead end job, and a loaded mortgage.

They work to pay off the mortgage but forget to live, YES! it seems to be the right thing to do

but happiness, true happiness is important!.

You need a plan!

1. Decide what makes you happy? What will make you jump out of bed at 5am in the

morning and be willing to do what you love. (For me, its definitely facilitating healing in the human body)

2. Start reducing your debt! Sell the car. Sell the house. Start to live SIMPLER. Cut up the Credit card.

3. Start doing INTRO spection of your SPIRIT and SOUL. Get to know who you are.

4. Do a Inner cleanse of Old Emotions! Write them down, burn the page releasing anger, bitterness,

sorrow! Then forgive, bless all involved including you  and choose to move on.

5. Do an OUTER cleanse : Give away what you no longer need. Old clothes, Furniture, junk.

6. Start doing YOGA and  go for a morning walk everyday.

7. Raise your vibration : Eat clean food like vegetables and fruit. Reduce your cigarettes, alcohol. Explore

juicing and smoothies. Find out about raw food, salads, superfoods.

8. Create a VISIONBOARD of moving forward. Collect pictures from magazines.

9. Save, Save, Save $$$$.

10. Invest in you. If you need to study: Do so.

If you need to learn a skill, look for volunteering opportunities or internships.

11. Start gathering what you need to function as a business owner. For example,

if you want to be a massage therapist, buy a 2nd hand massage bed. Collect towels, essential oils.

12. Knowledge is power: Read up, Research, Learn all you can about what field you intend to

enter. GOOGLE! go to the Library. Start exploring what you love.

13. Start a spiritual practise like meditation to open your Intuitive gifts.

14. Listen to your heart only. If someone gives you advice :

Ask – where have you been?What have you done?

Where are you going?

Being fulfilled creates happiness within.

A happy body has no disease.

A happy person who fulfills their purpose is supported by the Universe.

You can email me : for a cleansing massage or

Reiki session.

The Time to start is NOW!


My Simple Pleasures

After my detox, I have found myself to be more expressive of my truths and feelings.
The simplicity of my life and the choices I make everyday to keep it that way.
So, here are some of the questions I receive:
Will you go camping? No, because I love my bed and pillow and my home.
Will you go to a trance party? No, tried 2 and I didn’t enjoy it. I love being at home and enjoying my space of silence and just being.
So do you drink alcohol? Dope? Nope, I believe in being sober and clean. What I do to my body affects my mind, body and spirit, so clean is good for me thanks.
Appreciating my life more and more each day being filled with Gratitude for all that is, is my happiness.
For living in nature and enjoying the silence.
For being content with the simple stuff.
I will definitely try something once, but if it wasn’t fun, the chances are slim that I’ll do it again.
I enjoy reading and learning about different healing techniques.
I enjoy mixing oils and experimenting with new massage techniques.
I enjoy walking in nature, alone.
I enjoy being in my own space and company so much.
My life is happy, joyous and full. I wake up at dawn and do yoga, I walk in meditation and
Use the time to focus my energy and body for healing.
I enjoy being with my partner and we welcome anyone for tea and a good laugh.
I go to bed early, by 8pm, I need my pillow and off to bed I go.

The Simple Pleasures of just living is what makes me happy!

What makes you happy! Well go do it….

3 day detox : my challenges





I started a detox program for myself and a friend to rid my body of toxins both physically

and emotionally.

Day 1 : We drank raw green juices: Celery and apple at 7am. A smoothie of papaya/banana with berry juice.

At 10am we had one bowl of rice with fried radishes/onion to clean out our bodies.

Radishes are a lovely detoxer of mucus. My  nose instantly became runny and I sneezed alot.

In between: We had rooibos tea with honey/lemon. Water. Kombucha a probiotic drink to cleanse our liver.

At about 12pm we had a small portion of nuts, the size of our palms of our hand.

At about 3pm, a apple, with some nuts.

At 5.30pm a green soup consisting of spinach / sweet potatoe from the garden blended and

cooked, two bowls for dinner.

This meant we fasted for +-12hrs until 7am the next morning.
It was hard, and very disciplining.

I spent time doing alot of introspection of my feelings :

1. Things I hold onto, unintentionally.

2. Old agreements : Discreating them and Changing my inner affirmation.

3. I was forgiving and releasing more.

4. I journalled alot to clean out all the old emotions and disappointments.

5. I was busy all the time but I never felt weak, I felt stronger for being more disciplined.

6. I grew healthier in my mind by letting go of the old wounds.

7. I grew to love myself more and just became more relaxed and accepting of alot feelings.

8. I grew to love Silence. To listen to my body and its inner voice more.

9. The no food – made me speak my truth more, no sugar coating or withholding anything.

10. I feel free : Lighter and more enthused to be myself by being disciplined in my diet.

It  is good to journey inwards to affirm who you are and what you stand for!

7years of Healing Reiki ..lessons so far

Face with crystal SML


I received my Reiki Masters Attunement on 13th September 2007, on that same day, I

became a vegetarian. It was not planned, I just couldn’t put a living piece of meat or

chicken into my mouth anymore. For the next 6 months, I couldn’t walk

down a isle with meat in it. I felt the animals last “thought” of fear, anxiety and

uncertainty of what the moment of death brought to them.

I learnt later on to just release and let the spirits move on.

I quit my corporate job in 2007, and journeyed to India to find

my true self: The Colleen on the Inside.

I have been practising Reiki for 7years and

what I have learnt is that I am the “vessel” for the

healing to take place, I just activate the LOVE that is already inside

of you. Your body has a Healing capacity of its own which is

ignited by LOVE.

I have found that people will lie easily.

It is far easier to be a victim, to choose suffering, to

feed excuses than to actually make a plan to

take full responsibility of your life.

The people who rave the loudest about coming back for Reiki

and how amazing it is, you might see them again in 5 years time.

People often practise more self abuse than self love.

People will freely give you advise on how to make money or grow bigger:

I look at ? where you have been? where are you going?what have you achieved? How is your life?

I have met many people offering me land to build a healing centre,

but they actually have no plan at all. Listen to your inner voice it will guide you.

Your focus as a “therapist” and your intention to assist others to heal is imperative.

A clean vessel : no meat, no alcohol, no toxins : A healthy body and healthy mind is key to be awesome at what you do.

Your needs as a person should be looked after. After India, I agreed with myself

I will live in a place with electricity, a good road access, hot water :

these are my  necessities, so I am taken care of.

A healthy delicious diet with balance is good for me,

so I stay healthy and happy.

Within myself I need to keep Reiki ing me and keeping my heart clean and light.

Everyday is a new day to keep walking my path….

Cultivating a happy day everyday because I love my life and

I love what I do so much.

Raise your Vibration!


Keeping your body healthy, as a receptive spirit ….

Living from your heart : Keep your heart clean = forgive freely.

Keeping body healthy = Exercise, drink water, do yoga, meditate.

Want a happy spirit = Bring forth joy, happiness, peace within yourself.

Do what you love = Love what You do!

Live your purpose = Fulfilled Dharma and supported by the Universe.



Dear Inadequate body



Dear Inadequate body!

I go to the mall and I see skinny mannequins, wow! they’ve never tasted chocolate.

I know the obsession to be crazy about your body is there.

To overexercise, to diet, diet, to cut out all the  joy of

living and eating, but dear body, this is not me.

I love to wake up at sunrise and go walking.

I love the feel of the sun on my skin.

I love the sounds of the birds chirping.

I love watching the wind in the forest.

I feel happy to be me.

Yes, I’m imperfect, I have curves but I love me.

Everyone is rushing after the perfect six pack,

the new diet.

Dear body, I loved walking on the promenade at the beach with you.

Feeling the sand between my toes.

I loved all of our adventures of cycling, kayaking, rock climbing,

hiking, climbing Table mountain, shoveling dirt in India.

Learning to drive a motorbike in India.

You and I body have lived. Wait! we still living.

Body, I accept you, you are certainly my best friend, and

beautiful and amazing.

I overwork you sometimes, but tonight I will sleep

and tomorrow, you’ll be renewed, forgiven me.

Thank you dear Inadequate body.

Thank you for helping me see, you’re perfect as you are.

Thank you for this amazing journey we have and keep having.

Thank you that I don’t have to wait for my six pack to be amazing,

I can just choose to beeeeee amazing.

Thank you.

Your Aura and Your Motivation



This is an aspect of your Aura! Every feeling, emotion, experience is filtered through your


You are a magnificent being of Light

sometimes DARKNESS comes

and you need to SHINE your Light

and face your Darkness.

Some methods which I use when I am faced with my darkness:

1. Read books by SARK or Sonia Choquette or Robin Sharma

they will kick start your inner light.

2. Movie that inspires  : WHAT the BLEEP do we Know?  learn about metaphysics.

3. Go for a WALK

4. Self Talk : Talk to Yourself.

5. Cry in the Shower.

6. Scream in a pillow, or just bend your knees and


7. Write down your feelings and express them, then burn the page:
forgive, bless, love and move on.

8. Your Shadow will try and involve others : with drama, Gossip.

OWN your Darkness and Handle it with Love.

9. Take a nap of 20 minutes everyday.

10. Start learning about something NEW, get those brain cells working.

11. Reduce your CYBER world Links: less Facebook, Less Twitter, Less

Whats app. Take back your Time.

Enjoy the New Revived you!

Motivate Your Mind, Body, Spirit




To motivate your body start with the basics : Drink Water and infuse it with fruit,

it will help you detox! and you’ll feel lighter.


Start Meditating for at least 5 minutes a day. Your mind is a Magical tool of imagination.

If you can imagine it, You can create it.




 Move your body! Stretch and do Breathing exercises everyday.

Kick Start you!

Imperfect Body welcome.

Life so far. . . .

Colleen AUG

Life so far. . .

The last two months has been busy. So let me start :

I had my greatest month as

a therapist ever! I did 51 treatments in 31 days for July 2014.

I was determined to compete with myself and grow me and

face my deepest fears of being successful both financially and materially.

Next, my partner got tick bite fever, which he has had before but this time

round the “crazy” fever and overcoming it was a little bit more intense!

Shoo~! so glad its over.

We created a vision board and two items has already come true on it!

How amazing!

I have been venturing out of my comfort zone :  to Durban, facing traffic, noise and loads of

people to learn to cope with being sensitive around people.

I take rescue remedy and carry pietersite, ulexir and obsidian on my

body so I don’t feel anyones vibration.

I enjoyed Durban so much! people were walking on the beach,

running, cycling. It was awesome. I spent 4hrs on the promenade

with Nicole and loved every minute. Thank you Nicole.

Next: I went to have dinner at my neighbours : Katie at Lemonwood cottages.

She made my partner and I  : A 3 course meal: cheese puffs,

fish pie and chocolate pudding. The evening of great laughter

and joy was amazing! Katie is awesome, amazing and

an inspiration to me. I so enjoyed having dinner next door…

thank you !!! Katie

Things I have realized is that most people’s life isn’t easy.

Here are a few of the things I have been pondering about …

I am blessed and I am living a abundantly life.

I live next to a forest.

I walk to “work”.

I love what I do and I get paid to do it.

I love being healthy : I love my raw juices, smoothies, pizza once a week / cake

once a week.

I love being healthy and drinking love infused water and kombucha.

I am a vegetarian and I love eating healthily.

I don’t do caffeine, coke, fizzy sugary drinks, no milk, no alcohol, no drugs.

I choose to live a healthy awake and aware life, and this makes everything amazing

and sacred.

Being a healer / Therapist isn’t for everyone but I love it!

I accept that I am fit and that I am OK! with not having a 6 pack,

but I have decided to be AMAZING despite my imperfections.

Good + Bad = Shades of Grey

Grey clouds

As a ex catholic/christian/jew/ religious freak, my view was good or bad, right or wrong.

I believed in absolutes! but that isn’t what I believe now…..

Years later, I am discovering all kinds of shades of grey in my life and with all other human beings.

I used to think that people who create weapons of mass destruction, ie. guns, landmines, nuclear weapons were bad people. Well subsequently, I have met two people who are passionate about making weapons, firing them and designing them. They have also saved many lives in their profession.

Hollywood has romanticised James Bond 007, who is a spy, who kills people, who is a weapon within himself.

There are actually people out there who are happy to be in war zones.  War =  Good Money! for some.

I have checked them out : they have Aura’s, they are born healers, and empathic, highly intuitive, clever human beings.

(the two: I have met, so far.)

I recently read Don Miguel Ruiz book, called the The four agreements:

refrain from judging, blaming, assuming and taking things personally.

I can honestly say, I could not have done healing on these humans if I judged them.

I looked at them with compassion and love like any other person. They needed love and healing.

As a adult I realise that people do jobs for money, it’s their survival instinct to want to exist.

Obviously, these types of jobs have their karma. So, why are we prejudice about it?

Is it much less a bad thing to bad mouth our spouse or back bite our neighbour with our words than to kill people for a living?

I feel each one is a path.

We choose it with our words.

Giving into victim hood, suffering, opening wounds of the past and living off anger :

All are Harmful to the Spirit!

So, I find the human body, mind, spirit fascinating.

I find that no matter what our job is, deep down..we can choose to be of exceptional character.

To live our truth.
To speak it.

To live our passion.
To be happy.

This is every human beings right.

To be authentic.

We are after all just human.

Finding our way to spirit.

Article to be published in the Domican Republic: Cancer and Reiki


Cancer : Alternative Methods.
The Emotional root source of Cancer is deep resentment, helplessness, hopelessness, self pity,
And Distrust.
I treated my first cancer patient in 2009. She was in her 50’s, a single mom and she ran her own business. At that stage of her cancer, she was in remission. Her kids were grown teenagers.
She recently lost her husband and she was a widow.
The cancer itself was in her pancreas.
Her first reiki session was a tearfilled one. I explained how the cancer was created. She told me about her husband, how you verbally abused her with words. He was mean to her body and her soul. She felt hopeless because she could not leave him, a deep resentment grew within, hence the creation of the cancer.
I explained how the Reiki works, how it heals the body on a physical, emotional, intellectual level. How the energy itself has a intelligence of its own.
I reiki’d all of her chakra’s : Crown, 3rd Eye, Throat, Heart, Solar plexus, Sacral, Base, Knees and Feet.
{Chakras are the energy wheels of the body}
Her body was completely relaxed and balanced. I explained : I would be doing psychic energetic surgery on her pancrease to remove any traces of cancer.
For the next 3 months we worked on igniting the healing within her body, with Reiki and massage.
She quit her stressful job.
She started creating a garden.
She started creating mosaic.
She even met someone, she was now cancer free, loved and happy. The cancer association was going to do research on her being a cancer survivor with reiki. I was very excited, her will to heal and willingness to do the inner conscious work healed her.
How can you prevent cancer from growing in your body?
Take 20 min of Rest everyday : Nap Time.
Take care of yourself with exercise everyday.
Ensure your diet is high in fruit and vegetables, with limited animal products.
Feed your spirit everyday with creating, playing, doing what you love.
Try something new.
Read inspiring books to keep you motivated.
Try to live a happy and stress free life.
Choose to be happy everyday.
Choose to Forgive and Bless by Letting go everyday.
Love your body.
Let go of any negativity that hinders you.
Say NO! and mean it.
Speak your truth.
Live an Honest and healthy life.
Be kind to yourself and Others.
For questions or queries :
Colleen van Heerden
Reiki Master/Therapist/Blogger
Facebook: Midlands houseof Healing
Blackberry Channel : C0024A0B6

Fear of C -h- a- n- g- e-




Change is often a very scary word!

Everyone wants it but when it comes to actually doing it, the fear of the unknown or the lack of discipline frightens many.

I have been facing myself on this matter a lot. Keri gave me,  the book : The Four Agreements and the book called the Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz. Previously, I had considered myself “ok” ish. I read the Four Agreements and well there were parts of the book which I realized that I need to be impeccable with my words more. I need to bring more light, I need to not speak any bad things or poisons out to the Universe, even if I am pissed off, which happens sometimes.
I realized that these books came at the right time, it was time to change within for me.
I have added them to my daily affirmations : Refrain from Judging, Blaming, Assuming or taking it Personally.
Also, no speaking poisons of any kind, no gossip, no allowing my ego or shadow to take over.
Keep living Spirit every moment of the day!   this is no easy task.
I have been domesticated, raised by people who have cursed people to death, I kid you not!
My grandpa was cursed by my grandma = died exactly so
My uncle was cursed by aunt = he never came home
My sister cursed her husband = he was killed in an accident
So, you see the cycle to use your words for darkness and not for light is possible.

They all unintentionally, in anger used the words when they felt helpless and

in a “victimized” situation.

These are very harsh consequences to live with.

So I keep myself in check, I needed
To uncover all of the old wounds, the poisons spoken upon me, for example:
Your stupid!
Your Ugly!
Your inadequate! You wont amount to much!
Discreating these agreements, released me and I felt a deep shadow lifting from my soul.
I kept going even when I felt uncomfortable, and uncovered a few wounds of fear.
Don Miguel says anger is only a mask reflection of fear.
I committed to myself to do the Inner work so that I could grow. Everyday, I am now
Being conscious and aware of my thoughts and intentions. The most important deep change

within Is that I love me a little more which has made me even more comfortable with myself.
Accepting myself on a deeper level and this has made me kinder to myself.
Like accepting of myself as a person who has needs.

Needs of comfort : good food, soft bed and pillow, hot baths, quiet environment

to work and live in, comfortable clothes, a good life.
You can see the change on the inside has now affected my entire life on the outside.
I am calmer, a deep seated calmness, a non reactive attitude of great change is taking place.

I am feeling more me. I have started speaking my truth more and more.

I ask more questions and clarify things, so I understand them better.

The Change is happening, its flowing like a perfectly natural occurence.

Want to grow! Read the Four Agreements and the Mastery of Love!

It will change your world.


Lotsa Love



Growing into thy beautiful self


Growing into thyself.. . .

To thyself be true.

Speak it.

Live it.

Breathe it.

If you don’t like it, say it.

Keep your energy in tact, stay grounded.

Run from drama, heightened emotions or chaos, dodge baby dodge it.

Take long naps in the sun.


Laugh often.

Have beautiful moments everyday.

Listen to the birds, listen to the bees.

Hug a tree.

Go for a walk.

Stretch, Move, Shake your bootie.

Love with all your heart.

Clean your heart out, forgive.

Kiss till your knees wobble.

Be massaged at any given time….

Just love being you!

Grow into Loving yourself, its a wonderful journey!

Power of your I n t e n t i o n


At the beginning of the year, I made a vow to myself, this year : no more bronchitus.

I had bronchitus 3 times last year, I was forced to take anti biotics which I despise

and had my doctor lecture me. Obviously, I had a debate about the anti biotics with

him and deeply discussed the side effects of it. His expression and voice just

reinterated : Do you want to get better? I surrendered and took them.

It is August 2014, I am happy to say that I was not sick this year! yay!

I set my goal : with the Power of my Intention! I will not get sick, I will take

care of me and ignite the healing within me.

I am so happy, I reiki’d me, exercised, stayed aware of myself and rested when I needed to.



I also made my vision board for 2014, 8 days ago.

Five years ago, I decided to buy a

projector, I didn’t have the money but I did have the POWER of my intention.

I have saved and saved and on Monday I did a Happy dance! I collected my
LED Acer Projector, so I can watch movies in the comfort of my home.

I can make tea, I can pause and go weeeeeee, I can make a snack at home and

then go to bed. I love movies, especially inspirational one’s like

Forest Gump, What About me?, Deepak Chopra.

See : The Power of your intention, works for me. Its like I BITE

into the GOAL of having a projector, I feel it, I have it,

I meditate on it, I receive it.  PING! It is here, looking at me

from my computer. I am oh soooo grateful and blessed.

You may think ? How How How!

1. Set a Goal.

2. Use your POWER of Intention : Speak it, think of it, imagine it everyday.

3. Close your eyes, FEEL what it feels like whatever you want.

4. Ask the UNIVERSE for Abundance to flow to this IDEA.

5. Be passionate about it.

6. Receive, Bless, Be Grateful!

Next on the Vision Board !     Hawaii!

Happy Creating.



Seeking ? Life support system for a Penis …..

LIfe Support System

I call this my recollection of my search for a “life support system for a penis” : My dating experience.

Well I started out late in my 20’s, I was very detached, and I mean very.

I learned that I could not give my heart to anyone, and thus I protected myself.

I had a very strict code Kiss and move on.    I then discovered the internet

chat dating, and met guys  in a chat room online, a lot of different characters.  My experiences were very funny.

For example : when they said tall, fair, handsome = Gothic, skinny, and non social.

When they said good personality, kind = They ended up being fat and I mean really fat

with loads of issues.

I agreed to meet a guy at a cafe, and when he arrived we instantly knew that we wouldn’t connect.

Lesson ~1. People lie because they cannot face their own truth.

The next lesson I learned  is that being a good lover, doesn’t mean he is a good character.

My boyfriend who asked me to marry him, had dumped his girlfriend on the same

day, we met and then introduced her to me. I was so shocked, I didn’t even know we were dating.

Lesson ~2.  Great orgasms doesn’t mean his of good marriage character.

I happily said NO! to his proposal and I am so glad I did!

I have learned that guys don’t really know who they are, they are mostly

not responsible, they don’t think about consequences and

also they are not self aware.

Lesson ~3. Date someone who knows WHO he is and he is prepared to do the Inner work to Heal.

Next: Women Need to be Specific. Specific about what you want in a relationship. Men do not read minds.

Lesson ~4. I was very very specific in asking the UNIVERSE for my man.

Given he was freshly divorced, hurt, broken. I didn’t know it at the time

but I wanted to fix him, being a EMPATH and all, I felt his pain and wanted

to make it disappear. He completed all the character listings on my list

for a partner but what I didn’t know is that he would be a light upon my

path and teach me so many lessons.

As a woman I gave everything for love, I later learned that this is very exhausting,

I mean I am not super woman, I am human, I get tired and I need rest to.

Lesson ~5. Speak up, Ask for HELP, Speak your truth if and when you are unhappy.

Be Self Actualized as a person before you embark on a life partnership with someone.

This is imperative, otherwise you bring your baggage into the mix

and well its explosive.

Lesson~6. Have a relationship of  Self Love with Yourself, this is the Key to happiness.

Say No. Say No frequently and often and mean it.

Lesson~7: Don’t say Yes and mean No. Do not be a people pleaser to make him happy.

You need to be happy in a relationship, not subdued or surrendered or manipulated.

Lesson ~8: Be yourself 150% at all times, don’t pretend you wake up with a neat

hair do, when you have awesome bed hair.

Woman often sacrifice themselves for love. Sex for Love or Lack of Sexual Satisfaction for


Lesson ~9: Ensure your man is a exceptional lover! and I mean at least 50 orgasms in a

session, please.

Giving of yourself is important but don’t give so much!  you bring your 50% and he brings

50% together build something amazing.

Lesson ~10: Don’t be a doormat for him or anyone, life is to short to keep crying

about it, so Speak up, love yourself enough : to do it.

When I connected with my partner, I felt I could change him, big “yeah” right !

People are who they are. You should love your partner for who he is and

he will change himself if he chooses to. You cannot expect someone to

become you, it is easier to find someone like you than to keep hoping for change.

Lesson ~11: Quit wanting to change your partner, accept him or move on.

If you are into spirituality and passionate about it, ensure your partner

is happy for you. It is hectic being with a critical person who doesn’t support who you are.

Lesson ~12: Live your truth, be who you!

Happily HIPPIE!


What lies beneath . . .


Inside beneath all the mask lies a little girl.

A little girl struggling to find her way in a womens body.

Owning her own business, being responsible, living up to the

expectations of her parents.

She’s tasted freedom!  It didn’t include a house owned by the bank,

it included living out of a backpack and  having nothing.

Freedom to dance under the stars without judgment.

Freedom to have no one blame her, assume or take her words

to personally.

Freedom to have fun! to laugh freely.

To play.

To talk to strangers.

To make friends in a foreign land where she didn’t need to worry

about rape, abuse, or any harm, a safe place.

Freedom to be herself, where she didn’t need to protect her

heart, where she could just LOVE.

Love herself deeply, become her best friend and

just Be.

Happy Women’s day!  x xx x

I need you doesn’t mean I LOVE YOU


Yesterday in the shower, I had a realization about “I need you” doesn’t mean I LOVE YOU!

It really made me start to analysis my life as I thought that NEED was LOVE ?

My family needed me in all kinds of roles : the role of cleaner, babysitter, helper,

builder, shopper, fixer. If there was a need even a financial one, I would

be the ONE helping. I thought need was love, well it turns out, it isn’t.

LOVE is when someone loves you unconditionally. You are treated with respect,

kindness, tolerance, you are seen as a person and your human needs for

rest, food, clothes are catered for.

NEED ? is a scary thing. People manipulate others – in relationships to

fulfill their sexual needs, or financial needs or need for “security”.

Co-dependance is a scary thing when your fear is holding you

back from being a fulfilled person.

In my life I made a decision to be a WHOLE person to do things that scare me,

like going to INDIA alone, like driving, like getting to know who I am,

it is truly the best thing you can do for yourself.

INDEPENDENCE is the ability to function without your partner,

and to also give him the freedom to do the same.

As couples we are not joined at the HIP.

We need to do things on our own, so we can grow by ourselves,

and learn to appreciate each other more for being Strong,

Adventurous, and Brave.

So, watch out for the “I need” you word, thinking that its LOVE!

it isn’t, be wise and make good decisions for you!

Only you know whats good for you.

So, start living it.

Breathing it.

Being it.

Lotsa love


The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

4 Agreements

I am blessed to have Keri B from hand me this amazing book.

I remember on my Kahuna Level 3 course, how Anthea Hardwick explained how you should be :

Impeccable with your words.

Do not take it personal.

Refrain from Blaming, Assuming and Judging.

These words stuck with me and I kept on doing the Inner work for my spirit.

This book by Don Ruiz is amazing! Now, to give you some background

about me, I read my bible cover to cover by age 8, it took me a whole year

and its as if I swallowed the knowledge, ingested it.

It all made sense to me. How God created the Earth, how words have power to

create and how we speak our world into being : both positive and negative.

The Agreements for me, explains it so much better. It reminds me of

what “Jesus” said about two people agreeing on something and

it will be so. (rusty recollection)

HOWEVER, it is so much more to it! Like White Magic and Black Magic.

Black magic being, when someones says  : YOU are Fat! You are Ugly and YOU being YOUNG

agree! this is a AGREEMENT! where you agree to it.

This then filters into your life and affects everything : Like being SHY,

distant, unsocialable, until you break it with “White magic” of LOVE.

What I am doing : is I am verbally saying : ” I release that Agreement of Being FAT/ Ugly”

I discreate that agreement! and it feels like a huge weight lifted from my soul.

I am wonderful, beautiful, and amazing : I positively affirm myself.

It goes onto to describing how GOSSIP is a poison and how we let

it poison our mind against people, things, situations and how

we need to stop it.

Being Happy, Loving, Content is good for your soul and Being.

Visit :

or Buy the BOOK!

It is worth every R1, you spend.

Thank you Keri B!


How to Create Your Vision Board : 2014



You Need:  Cut outs from magazines, pritt x 2, a huge cardboard, IMAGINATION, Good Music.

Create it with your partner!!!

Step 1 : Collect magazines and cut out pictures and words that INSPIRE you!


Step 2 : Start pasting some of the Pictures on your Cardboard, try combining pictures with words while you dancing.

Ensure you incorporate pictures of your OLD visions boards also, so you are building on a solid foundation of Abundance.


Step 3 : Place the completed Vision board on a solid surface, everyday bless it, visualize, play, create, and JUST imagine.


Step 4. CUT, BURN, Release your old vision board, bless it and release all expectations and attachment, say it! and let it go.


YOU are now ready for your new adventure of 2014 of Abundance.


Happy Creating!


Lotsa Love




6 Years of Adventuring within…….



On the 6th August 2008, I arrived back from India with a backpack of clothing.

I had nothing! I felt free and Ready to begin. . .

I then started my adventure of a True Life, most of all it was hard work, endurance,

dedication and confidence in myself. I will share some awesome moments with you.

Moving from Cape Town to India to Bethlehem to the Midlands – what an adventure.

Opening my practise in 2009 : Bethlehem  : The most hostile place for a holistic healer, done it!

Loosing weight : 114kg to 85kg and maintaining it! Takes discipline and dedication.

Having my tarot read by a Parot in India : Priceless.

Having my nose pierced in 5 seconds in India.

Learning to Drive a car and motorbike in India! Oh my goodness! done it.

Cutting up my credit card and burning it, hard! done it.

Moving my practise and blossoming with it! done it, will continue to grow with it.

Learning 7 different types of massage and retaining the knowledge! done it.

Teaching over 43 people Reiki / Massage from different countries! done it.

Travelling to India on my own twice! done it.

Driving my scooter in the Midlands! done it.

Being financially supported by the Universe! Done it! and still doing it.

Believing in myself and in the Universe! doing it.

Eaten every possible delicious dish I could! doing it!

Meeting amazing people with awesome stories! d o i n g it!!

Meeting interesting Healers in Auroville! done it.

Having a supportive partner!   d o i n g  it!

Starting a blog! inspired by Keri  – – – work in progress. (thank you)

Starting a website! inspired by Andrea  – – – thank you!

Started a Blackberry channel of over 900 subscribers! wahoo.

My journey of life, involved learning about myself and learning to heal the

Colleen on the Inside has healed so many filters that I am happy and

content with Myself.
Ready for any adventure that is presented!


The Universe is my Genie!   : Your Wish is my Command!

Quit the Job you hate!

Settle your debt!

Give things away!

Be Lighter and Free!

Go for an adventure to or





Be Gloriously Gay !

Its ok to be gay

I remember meeting, my first gay person at 5 years old. My mom took me to a hair salon

which was filled with woman.  They had the most beautiful features, make up, perfect hair,

well dressed, professional people. They spoke with such authority.

I couldn’t decide if they were men or women? My brain was confused at how something

so beautiful, could possibly be a man!?

They treated me with great kindness and made me lunch! I thought they

were the happiest people in the world. They laughed loudly, made so

many jokes, were openly bitchy in the nicest possible way.

Truth be told, I didn’t know what gay was. When someone explained it to me,

all I knew was I wanted to be “gay happy”!

I wanted to play with all the different clothes, laugh out loud and be Gloriously gay!

Over the years I have met some gay people. First off, let me say I did some research.

Pregnant mother’s hormonal levels influence the child’s sexual orientation,

so being gay, isn’t really a choice. Who chooses to be judged? 

Who chooses to face non acceptance by their family?

Who chooses to be treated with great prejudice? 

No one really! 

Your sexual orientation is only ONE part of who you are!

The rest of you is Spiritual, Happy, Intuitive, Joyful, full of 

Lovely Creation.

So be GLORIOUS gay!!!!! and most of all be you!

PS: Parents Accept your sons or daughters gayness it isn’t a Disease.

Sons / Daughters Accept, love, and be Gloriously Fabulous Darling!

From : Colleen with Love.