8 years ago I returned to an unknown life.
I started in a town that is and will be conservative.
I revisited Bethlehem in the Free State this weekend addressing the confines of my own boundaries and limitations.
I have changed dramatically, I no longer have the inclination to take on another’s pain or
to have my pain body triggered by anyone.
I am able to freely stand up for myself and address whatever I need to say.
I no longer subdue the feelings I have because I choose to be me.
Some of the lessons have been hard, the ones that make you cry in the shower,
a deep sobbing that releases that dull ache within.
Here are some of the lessons I have learnt :
- I cannot change anyone, I must stay in my own SKIN.
- Respect their story of victimhood, bitterness, drama, anger, resentment. Listen but don’t get involved.
- Your story belongs to you : I don’t feature in your movie, thanks.
- The absolutes that people use : ie. I can’t. I don’t, I m not going to is their inadequacy, leave it be.
- Fore-warn Intuitively : Sometimes you can warn someone and they will wipe the advise away and happily make bad life choices, let them. You are not responsible for them, so be detached.
- Discipline is a valuable tool – kids and adults need it. Discipline yourself to NOT jump in and save anyone. They will be ungrateful and unappreciative.
- Being of good character is an art that you practise everyday, by doing random acts of kindness. By doing anonymous good deeds. Living honestly with yourself and others. Listen but be sceptical, poor people don’t book holidays on their broke bank accounts, be discerning.
- Speak your truth. Bullshit, lies, manipulation, playing others, are all out there. Don’t conform to it. Be free enough to speak your truth.
- It is easy to moan, groan, complain, vent! It takes a great deal of will to keep quiet and channel the energy into solving a situation, don’t be full of hot air and have no back bone, Stand up!
- Gratitude has a lasting effect on yourself and others. Showing appreciation, making eye contact, being present goes a long way of sharing your humanity. Be human, Be present, be here and now, not anywhere else. This MOMENT is true.
- Excuses : Identifying a problem and fulfilling it with an excuse every time enables a weak character. A Life is filled with excuses is not a fulfilled spirit life, stop making them and get off your ass and take action.
Self LOVE – when you love yourself you protect yourself by saying NO to what does not serve you, act, don’t be a doormat of self sacrifice, it defeats the purpose of learning.
Living a LIFE of purpose is imperative : When you have purpose,
nothing else matters, so find yours and dedicate all of your efforts to it,
life is for the LIVING, go live it.