Have you been catfished?

fake

What is a catfish?  Catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they’re not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.

I have been catfished, many times in my life. (not anymore)

It basically started in my 20’s. (I was young and naiive)  I purchased a computer, I uploaded Microsoft chat and icq

and I joined a singles chat room in South Africa. What I learnt was funny, disappointing and

hard to swallow!  so here we go  :

  1. When people describe themselves:  Tall and handsome it meant  – short and fat. A nerd and an introvert person meant a gothic type person.   Each person  I met in real life, was not what they described on line, they either were the complete opposite, or they LIED about everything!
  2. The personal information people share online, via whats app, facebook, twitter, bbm channel or any other social media – we start to create this magical person in our heads which is a figment of our imagination, you are creating a expectation which surely will lead to disappointment! I know it….
  3. When you eventually meet this person, you have been chatting to for a year or 2 or 3 years, you like WTF – who are you, you certainly NOT what I pictured. You are not the person who drinks 3 cups of coffee or smokes 20 cigarettes, in my head, what did you do with the invisible you? The person, I liked.
  4. When described as …I am loving, kind, spiritual, gentle and easy to live with. – When you share this information with someone they form a picture of you, this picture, doesn’t say you wear black clothes or spend 2 hours in the bathroom. All these good character traits are relative, my kind of spiritual is waking up early, doing exercise, yoga, meditation and prayer, this is my spirituality, it isn’t if you are not a morning person. (your not spiritual)
  5. Truth is – people cannot speak their truth if they are not 100% honest with themselves. I am. I know I can be kind and gentle and loving and I know I can easily unleash my warrior on you, bad ass instantly.
  6. Online pictures, all of my pictures are current and it is exactly what I look like. If you have  pictures of 20 years ago online and promote yourself as being young, and you are 40 something, wake wacky please wake up.
  7. When meeting a stranger, ensure you are meeting in a public place, because if they lie so easily, you need space to run away, ie to the toilet….keep running, jump through the window..keep running unfriend, block, delete.
  8. Gut feeling : your gut feeling is your intuition, if you are NOT feeling it, escape, say no this is not for me. (run)
  9. Don’t people please, if you don’t like someone say so and MOVE on, don’t stick in their hoping they will change, I promise they won’t.
  10. Blind dates  – Don’t let anyone set you up! so far, this hasn’t worked for me….. it just becomes a painful exercise.
  11. Does he or she fulfil me?  Physically? Emotionally? Intellectually? Sexually?  Is he or she intelligent? Take the time to figure out if this person is for you. Do you either choose to grow together and strengthen each other?Don’t sleep together on the first date, as it takes a year or more to figure anyone out, there is no short cut.
  12. KNOW what YOU Want?  Make a list of what you want in a partner, likes/ dislikes, what you want… it is that simple. Then let it go and know that person is on the way.
  13. Meet People IN Real LIFE, not in a bar, or a pub, somewhere neutral like a yoga club or gym, become friends FIRST before any hanky panky!  Lets NOT be Naiive….(people have baggage)
  14. LOVE yourself ENOUGH to know your self worth, don’t settle for scraps, wait for what you want!  no shortcuts.
  15. Be confident in your ability to attract your soul mate, nothing else will do, be authentic enough to wait, nothing worthwhile is instant.    Happy Visualizing and lets delete the catfish.   I  hope this made you laugh and laugh!!
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